Our similarities go beyond physical resemblances.
I think that it’s really funny that this is this week’s writing prompt, because not a day goes by where my mom doesn’t tell me how much I’m like my dad. She hasn’t always talked about it, but lately I think we’re all realizing how many of his traits I have. I’ve always thought my dad was a cool guy and when I was younger I always wanted to spend time with him. He’s been my best friend my whole life from dancing in the kitchen, teaching me to cook, talking about boys (he’s my #1 person to share drama with), and teaching me about the world around me. He’s always let me have my own opinions and styles even if they conflicted with his which looking back on it, I really appreciate. That being said, I can totally see his influence in my everyday actions like the styles of music I like, advice I give to my friends, even down to how I don’t take my shoes off when I get home and just wear them until I go to bed. Going back to what I was saying about my mom though, every little witty remark I make or stupid joke I let off makes her laugh and say “I swear you’re Dad’s twin.” It makes me feel good that I’m growing into the person I’ve always wanted to be like.
Oval-faced, lanky and long-waisted, blue-green mixed eyes, and exceptionally dry hands. My mother and I are nearly identical, our biggest separating factor being that of age. Although one look at an old photograph of her as a child is self-explanatory, my older relatives relish in telling me “you look exactly like your mom when she was your age,” at any given family function. It’s not just appearance, as I get older I feel myself falling into her habits as well. Whether it’s from her raising me right or simply the human nature of adopting the habits of those you surround yourself with, I’m totally turning into my Mom. Similarly, my older sister is exactly like my Dad, sarcastic, lacking in energy, and extremely nihilistic when it comes to the world and society. Interestingly with both of us, I find we have inherited certain traits that could be deemed as negative rather than a majority of positive traits. Maybe their unhealthy coping mechanisms influenced us to develop our own strange habits or maybe toxicity can be passed down through generations. Whatever the case, we are products of our parents, for better or worse.
I’m slowly becoming my parent.
When I was young, I despised order and routine. When my dad tried to make plans or establish rules I would find it very annoying and unnecessary. My brother and I would tease him for his constant use of the word “efficiency.” However, as I have grown older, I’ve come to the terrifying realization that I have inherited these traits. I write a daily to-do list, I go to bed and wake up early, and I find myself doing things my younger self would see as uptight. I am not as go-with-the-flow as I used to be, and yet, I am completely content with my newfound organization. As boring as it may seem, giving myself these parameters has helped me make the most of my days. Despite all of my past teasing, my dad has turned out to be a huge influence on my character, whether I like it or not.
— Ava, Glenbard West Highschool
The other day I was sitting on my computer doing homework like I am doing now, and suddenly I spaced off into the mirror in front of where I am sitting. At that moment looking at myself I realize that I have the same concentration face my father has when I see him sitting behind the screen doing conference calls. A very weird facial expression and quite funny too. After those moments, I start to question whether I have had these traits for a long time, but had not noticed?
— Gerardo, Miami Country Day School
I see common traits that I don’t necessarily want to have.
I have become increasingly aware in the past few years just how similar my mother and I are, from our outside appearance to our inner personalities. Both of us are perceived as scholarly and transparent people, which are true. We are also unconventional, we enjoy trying new things, and we share an amazing sense of humor. Mostly, I am proud of the parallels in our personalities; they show that we have a lot in common while maintaining our individuality. Although — unlike the author Ms. Grose’s distress — I don’t feel extreme negative feelings about our similarities, sometimes I am frustrated by how much certain traits of mine mirror my mother’s. In the midst of giving directions to my younger sibling I’ve caught myself using the same commanding tone as my mother, for instance. We are also both impatient, which causes us to butt heads. Even so, I don’t think my mother is a parent who would “catastrophize about [their] children’s experiences and assume that what [their child] experiences will be as bad as what [they] have felt in [their] own lives” based on our shared traits, as those traits are not self-destructive. After all, as my mother says, “try to take the good from people, not the bad.”
— Nathalia, Kenwood Academy – Chicago, IL
I look back at when I was younger and I find myself remembering the harshness of the raised-by-immigrants lifestyle. The pressure to meet expectations and do better in school. There were many things that I had to learn due to my surroundings that affected my parents. Since they were separated, it was even harder for me being so young. I notice sometimes that I have my dad’s anger issues and I lash out to the people I love even though I don’t mean to and five minutes later, I feel better or over the smallest things I get upset. I feel terrible and never want to be like my parents, but that’s the environment I grew up in. Now I find myself trying to leave the house as much as I can because of the things my mom doesn’t hide from me. Terrible partners and still trying to act twenty. That’s why I think I’ve picked the wrong people as well but that’s why many people don’t deserve kids but all kids deserve a parent.
I am considerably different from my parents.
In terms of what I have in common with my parents I feel that I do have a bit of similarities from each of them but not as much as people think. I think that a lot of our similarities are very much surface level like the same music taste, how we are very open and silly around the people we love but can also be shy around people we don’t know. This is to say that I think there are a lot of differences between us fundamentals like the different perspectives on how we see the world, religion, or even things like the value of family.